One of the best things in life are first kisses. Those of you in a long-term relationship, will always remember that first kiss that you shared with your partner, and we all know that that awkward yet thrilling excitement of a first kiss NEVER comes back. I’m not saying every kiss after that is not exciting, but that first one is just special. And sometimes it’s just that; a kiss. You’ll never see that person again, it won’t become a relationship, but that doesn’t mean the kissing part is less exciting.
4 miserable months into ‘singlehood’ – which I have not really accepted yet – I go out for a few drinks with some friends. I run into a friend of a friend of a friend who is getting a bit flirty with me. I don’t realise this as I have been out of that game for so long. When all our friends have left, we are still chatting and he says he had always found me attractive on those few occasions we had seen each other. He suggests to go somewhere else. Flattered by his declaration I decided to go along and see where this night takes me.
We go to this loud place where ‘younger people’ are dancing, I’m with this guy who is chatting me up and I don’t know why exactly I’m there. He’s around my height, maybe a bit shorter but I’m wearing heels so I’m not sure. He has made no remarks about my height whatsoever, the topic hasn’t even been mentioned. I like it. He’s in his forties, not handsome in a George Clooney type of way but there is something about him. He’s smart, he is witty and his voice is sexy.
I notice I am not really listening anymore. I’m done chatting. I guess I’ve had one too many beers, so I’m boldly making a move and he gets my point, he’s not shy and next thing I know I am in a bar, kissing a guy I barely know. Admittedly, after kissing the same guy for many years this is… exciting. I do have some common sense left, I’m not a teenager anymore and I feel a bit too old for this. Kissing in a bar isn’t my signature style, so I suggest we go outside.
It’s late. It’s quiet on the streets, and the outside chill brings me back to reality. We stroll around for a bit while holding hands, chatting (his voice still sexy) and then we kiss again.
I forgot how much I enjoyed kissing and this being my first ‘after-separation-kiss’, it’s a kind of affirmation that I am still attractive, that I can still do this.
At the same time, I realise this is enough for now, that I am not ready to take it any further. I tell him that, he understands and respects that. We kiss goodbye, we do not swap numbers, and when I walk home, I’m smiling. This is a first step in the right direction…
If you didn’t catch my introduction, you can find out more here. Stay tuned and watch this space, I’ll be back in a couple of weeks with Episode 2: Crossing Borders