Do you sometimes feel that people comment on how tall you are, much more than anything else?
That was my experience up to about 5 years ago, and it’s only recently that I figured out what changed.
The secret is simple: I now dress and style myself in ways that stand out more than my height.
Human eyes and minds are quick to pay attention to anything than stands out from the background, and ignore anything than blends in.
While some people are drawn to subtle features and harmonious combinations more than striking features and bold combinations, most of the people around you will instinctively notice and comment more on what stands out when they look at you.
So why not use that to your advantage and get noticed for all the other great things about you?
Always draw positive attention to your face.
Any or all of the following approaches works wonders here:
- A hairstyle that suits your unique face shape, there are tons of internet resources to help with this.
- A complimentary hair colour to your skin-tone. Hint, it won’t always be the hair colour you were born with!
- In colder months, wear a bright scarf around your neck. Pick colours that go well with your skin and hair; you’ll look brighter and more alert when you’re wearing a complementary colour.
- Even-toned skin via skincare or skincare plus make-up. Don’t worry too much about acne if you’re battling with it, having your skin look mostly the same colour makes a bigger difference in how you’ll feel and how other people will perceive your face. I myself have sensitive skin and rarely wear foundation so I use a lot of anti-hyperpigmentation skincare and wear sunscreen every day.
- Define your eyes with make-up – no need to go all out if you don’t want to! Some mascara, maybe a deep brown, grey, or black eyeliner / eye pencil is a good starting point. There are TONS of Youtube videos on eye make-up for all eye shapes, sizes, and colours.
- Define your lips with make-up – again a matter of personal preference. I love wearing bright colours on my lips, always pinks or reds.
- Draw attention to your cheekbones – any or all of blush, highlighter, contouring. Ironically this is where I don’t do much, but I make up for it with a vengeance on the final face pointer.
- Wear earrings. The shiniest, sparkliest earrings you can get away with. Cubic zirconia and Swarovski crystals are your friends! The light reflecting off them will draw all gazes towards your face like lightning to the tallest tree. A nice alternative is white / creamy pearl stud earrings, the bigger the better and they go great with work clothes in particular.
Always draw positive attention to your body features that are most attractive / that you feel most confident about
If you can’t think of any, a good friend will surely think of some for you. We could spend ages on this but I’ll focus on a few examples across the range:
- Small wrists compared to the rest of your frame; these call out for dainty wrist-watches, slim bracelets. If you’re feeling mischievous whilst in a crowded mall one day, wear a super sparkly bracelet, wave your arm in the air, and count how many men track your wrist with their eyes.
- Cleavage you’re happy to share some of with the world; avoid crew cut and high necklines, go for low V-necks and scoop necklines. If you want a more subtle effect, wrap tops or sheer mesh at the the neckline work well.
- Defined waistline / small waistline compared to your bust and hips; you were made to wear clothes that nip in at the waist, or put belts on top to get there! Usually a contrasting belt colour works better to the underlying clothes, but you can play around. Fit and flare dresses, Wrap dresses, A-line dresses, A-line skirts, pencil skirts – try them and see which styles you enjoy wearing the most.
- Slim legs; skinny jeans and leggings want to be worn by you. You may have to experiment and see if one suits you better than the other. I personally find jeans really uncomfortable but have a drawer full of navy and black leggings, in lightweight material for summer and heavier material for winter.
Wear more colours than black and grey, and go beyond pastels
Men, women, children, even dogs approach me much more often when I wear my go-to pinks, greens, or reds. Once I was in Starbucks wearing a black and red outfit and boy toddler came round the corner and stood in front of me, staring. I smiled at him and kept drinking my tea. His father carried him away, but the boy was back within 5 minutes. I have a bright pink umbrella and have lost count of how many little girls have approached me to play with it – same thing with any pink bags!
- You could wear bright tops. This winter, red sweaters will be in the shops. Or purple, burgundy, cobalt blue, pine green, emerald green, bright yellow, mustard, orange, fuchsia….pick the colour that suits your skin and hair, and rock it!
- You could wear bright skirts / trousers / pair of jeans / pair of leggings with a top in a neutral colour. I have two midi skirts in red, and in pink and often wear wthem with long-sleeved black tops.
- You could wear a bright dress, yes even in winter. I recommend at least 40 denier tights or stockings underneath. If the dress was designed for winter you might only need a coat or jacket on top, but with lightweight material you could layer a neutral sweater / shirt / blouse underneath. Good neutral colours for this include black, charcoal, greys, cream, ivory, and white. Light pastel colours e.g. light blues and light pinks can work well in some cases.
- I mentioned bright winter scarves earlier, how about colourful gloves? There’s bright red, muted red, medium pink, hot pink, mustard, dark green, navy, and even patterns!
- Colourful shoes; boots, trainers, heels, ballet style flats. These are all fun ways to add a bit of fun to your outfit and your day.
- Perhaps you could wear a bright coloured belt over your winter coat? Ooh, waist definition and bright colour in one!
Tops: Topshop Tall, Marks & Spencer / Trousers: Topshop Tall / Dress: asos tall / Gloves & Scarves: Author’s own / Shoes: Long Tall Sally Belt: asos tall
One more thing… Mindset
Get in the right frame of mind for accepting the many compliments that’ll be coming your way.
- Every morning, look in the mirror and say “Hello beautiful”, “Good morning gorgeous”, or “Hey lovely lady”. Keep doing this until you have completely accepted the fact that you are beautiful, gorgeous, and lovely. I’m serious – you can only stop this routine after you have accepted this fact about yourself.
- Never disagree or deflect a compliment, smiling and saying “Thank you” is the best thing you can do for yourself – read Jen’s recent article on this!
- Try to be less judgmental of your appearance, and of other people’s appearance. The more comfortable you are seeing beauty in everyone and everything, the more comfortable you’ll be in seeing beauty in yourself.
- Smile and laugh as much as possible. Nothing is more attractive than wearing a genuine smile, and laughing makes you and everyone around you feel better. I highly recommend having a list of your favourite sitcoms / funny videos / cute baby animal videos that you can quickly watch when you want a feel-good boost.