A lot of us feel pressure to be ‘good enough’, which can often mean we’re too hard on ourselves. Setting incredibly high standards that are impossible to reach – even with all these extra inches!  A little bit of this is healthy, it can drive us in a positive way but too much will eventually cause your confidence to come crashing down.

Here are five ways you can regain balance if you find that you’re holding yourself back.

1. Know you’re not alone

I’m going to let you in on a secret – no one really knows what they’re doing. Yup, that’s right… Nobody! All we are doing is our best with what we have.

2. Have a word with your ego

Having a strong word with your ego. Realising that you’re only human and there’s nothing that makes you any better than anyone else. If you can do this, you’ll take some of the pressure off and give yourself a break!

3. Put pen to paper

Why do we have amnesia when it comes to praise yet we can recall every criticism we’ve ever received? What is needed is a shift of focus and one of the ways you can do that effectively is; to write down any positive comments, nice things people say about you or praise that comes your way at work. Keep your list somewhere visible so you can add to it often and refer to it for a quick confidence boost when you’re feeling low.

4. NEVER compare yourself to others

There is absolutely no point in comparing yourself to any other person on the planet. Their success, bank balance and their lives in general have nothing to do with you! Everyone is walking their own unique path so stop punishing yourself by wondering why you’re “not as good” as those you admire. Nothing is as it seems and for all you know, they could be thinking the same as you.

5. Continually improve

Take a course. Read books. Go to talks. Meet new people. If you do everything you can to expand your skills, connections and knowledge, you’ll expand in different ways plus an added bonus of extra confidence.

“Confidence is something you create within yourself by believing in who you are”

We also spoke to Margot, Founder of Your Mind – you can see her social anxiety article here

First published in May 2016